Teaching An Old Mom New Tricks
It’s every mom’s dream to get her kids to talk to her, whether it’s a lunch date, phone call, or at the very least a text. Unless, that is, she can’t figure out how to text back.
But it might be a better idea NOT to teach her how to use the space bar, because once she gets the hang of this thing, she’s gonna demand that you text her all the time.
Lost Mom Alert
The internet can be a dark, scary, and frankly quite massive place. It’s easy to get lost in it, although at this point, some websites should be more obvious than others.
Texts like this make you wonder if there’s anyone out there that gets paid to give technology-challenged adults a tour of the internet. But then again, you might not want your mom on Twitter for personal reasons, so…be careful what you teach her. At least knows that Twitter is the farthest thing from private.
Who Runs “The Google?”
This poor mom must have been so confused when she somehow managed to open Google each day, only to find a new Google image waiting there for her.
And like only a mom can, she believed since her son had taught her how to turn the phone on, that he must also be behind the scenes changing the logo every day. He’s probably a great kid, but sorry Mom, he’s no match for the power of Google.
When She Forgets Her Kid
For everything that moms are good at remembering, like birthdays, appointments, and our favorite foods, there are some things Mom also might frequently forget – like her keys when they’re already in her hand or…her kid who she absent-mindedly brought with her to Walmart, and then absent-mindedly drove off without.
She’s too busy remembering everything about the kid to remember the kid himself! But you know she’ll pull that illegal U-Turn without looking first in order to pick him up quickly.
As children, it’s always strange to look at your parents and see them doing things that just seem to make no sense to you.
How can anything be right when the people that raised you, fed you, and taught you how to survive in this world are so wrong? Next time, Mom, it might make more sense to just find your glasses first, and text back later, so no one has to wonder if something is seriously wrong.
For a lot of us, getting creative with keyboard characters comes naturally – those colons are clearly eyes, and that parantheses is obviously a smile.
For a lot of moms though, it’s just impossible. This mom, on the other hand, knows her way around the keyboard – and that 8 was just obviously a bowtie! She has an idea in her mind of how her precious son should behave, and the emoji to make her message loud and clear. He might just need to get on her level.
When She’s Got The Jokes
It’s easy to take a mother’s love for granted, and we’ve all done it at some point. They sing, mess with your hair, call you nicknames, and crack jokes in public that make you wonder if you’re the same species.
As long as you love them, they don’t care if you laugh – but test their limits, and all that hard work they unconditionally do for you manifests into one grand slam joke that leaves them with the last laugh.
A Shoutout To Grandma
Grandmas are such a special breed of human – they’ve lived long lives, overcome many obstacles, and earned the right to say pretty much whatever they want.
They usually have a way of making us look more forward to reaching old age ourselves. Even when they’re critical or smacking you on the head, you know that they love you. They just might not ever be able to tell you that in a text message – and that’s okay. 7 is good too.
Dad Has A Few Pranks Up His Sleeve, Too
Mom isn’t the only one with a sense of humor. Today, “dad jokes” are notoriously corny, but when they do nail a joke it’s usually one for the books.
We can all hear the chuckle of a dad who knows he bested his kid with modern technology. And you can never know for sure whether they’re joking or serious, so…best to stay on Dad’s good side.
Why Did I Bother?
Technically, texting is designed to make communication easier and more efficient. But texts like these prove that with parents, texting only makes everything more complicated.
Nothing like a parent assuming you’re being purposefully unhelpful before realizing that they were just a pinch of patience away from the answers they were hoping for. The sad truth is, once moms learn the lingo and jump on the bandwagon to use it, it simply won’t be cool anymore.
Jedi Mom Trick
For better and worse, moms are like closet psychologists. They always, always, always know what’s really going on in that head of yours.
It’s the best thing when you’re in desperate need of a therapist (but just can’t afford one) to have your mom there reading your mind and letting you talk until you lose your voice…but the worst thing when they go reverse psychology on you and back you into a corner. Case in point.
They Just Don’t Get It!
When things go wrong, it’s never easy to look in the mirror and ask yourself if you, in fact, might be at the root of the problem.
But it seems like Mom’s extra quick to blame her phone for anything that seems amiss – and let’s face it, she’s quick to blame you too. Nothing says that your texts aren’t working quite like a working text, but explaining why she’s wrong might not go over so well…
Sometimes Dad Still Misses The Mark
No doubt fathers have the best of intentions, but really – who is this going to help? This is what earns people the nickname of Captain Obvious.
Either this dad just forgot how phones work for a second, or believed that his text had a way of spiritually transcending the phone and reaching his kid. But in this day and age, it’s actually quite surprising how lost we all are without our phones for 5 minutes…
Don’t Scare Me Like That
In a text message, an innocent question can be misconstrued any number of ways, and everyone should be careful. But when it comes to hypothetically discussing emergencies – maybe just don’t.
If you must, context can go a long way to make sure that someone who cares about you won’t worry that there’s an actual emergency, and completely panic. If moms can ever master the power of Google, texting will be a lot more safe…because Google doesn’t have any feelings.
Not My Kind Of Game
Teenagers and hate to do pretty much anything they’re supposed to do. Which is really fun for their moms. Every now and then, they’ve had just about enough of their kids doing everything they want and nothing their moms want.
But at the end of the day, every kid wants money, and every mom wants to make sure that they have enough of it – just as long as they’ve done their chores first.
The Glasses Don’t Always Help
Sometimes Mom just can’t deal with phones doing what they do – in this case, buzzing with each message. Granted, it is an annoying noise that we all deal with, with varying degrees of grace – and mothers fall to the very bottom of that hierarchy when they’re in the middle of exercising.
It’s hard enough to get on the treadmill without worrying that every buzz is an emergency! But unfortunately, the whole world can’t stop turning til she gets off.
Good One, Dad!
When you’re just trying to be nice and keep the conversation going, and your dad immediately makes you regret it. But also kind of makes you laugh.
But you’re not really sure if it’s because it was funny or just because he’s your dad and he’s ridiculous and you love him. You have to admit, he comes up with these absurd quips pretty fast for an old man. But either way, you’re probably not gonna repeat his joke at the next party.
It’s Not The Camera, Mom
Sometimes your parents have such a difficult time doing even the smallest thing on their phone that you start to wonder if they’re cursed – which is what they’ve been insisting this whole time.
If it isn’t a camera taking this picture, what does she think it is? And if it is a camera, wouldn’t it make sense to look for the lens and try to keep your fingers far away from it? Maybe that just makes too much sense.
Where’s The Dictionary?
Moms are supposed to know everything, so if she uses a word you don’t recognize, your first assumption will probably be that she’s sharing her genius with you and you need to get on her level.
But if that word comes in a text message, it’s probably best to assume the exact opposite – she most likely just couldn’t properly type the word, didn’t check it before sending the message, and walked away thinking that she said something brilliant as usual.
Nice To Not Meet You
What happens when you put a tiny piece of technology into the hands of a middle-aged man who has never had a cellphone?
That’s right – he sends the same text message more than once. He doesn’t even know that he’s making a mistake. We got the impression that his son tried to call him on multiple occasions, and this was his go-to response. However, this time, he didn’t answer his son simply because he couldn’t be bothered to talk.
Just Call Them From Now On
There are some things we write in a text that are easily open to interpretation. This is a fine example.
Although the person who texted it was frustrated that their mother didn’t understand exactly what he meant by “coming out,” it is a mistake that others could make. With that said though, he did reiterate what he actually meant and yet she still didn’t get what he meant! You should just call her from now on.
A Gift & A Curse
It’s never nice to feel like your sibling is stealing your thunder, especially when it involves one of your parents.
But this is what happened to this poor soul. It would have helped if Dad had asked his son the following instead: “Which phone do you think your sister would like most? Samsung S3 or iphone 5?” If only he had worded his message a bit more carefully, maybe this exchange would never have ended up in this article.
Very Happy Thanksgiving
They don’t call it Happy Thanksgiving for nothing. It’s a time to be joyful, smile with the ones you love. However, if you don’t have the chance to spend it with your family, at least you can send them a text message. If only they knew how to make emojis.
Hey, it’s the thought that counts. She made it clear that she wants to make an emoji and we’re sure her child can imagine the huge smile on her face as she sent it.
It’s funny that so many people in this world don’t really understand the significance of a hashtag. Basically, they are used on social media to link online users to the post in question, attaching it to the trend in question.
So when you start putting hashtags in a text message, it kind of defeats the purpose of them. Moreover, if you don’t know how to create an actual hashtag, writing the word “hashtag” makes things even less “cool.”
What’s The Fuss?
As previously mentioned, abbreviations can create all sorts of confusion amongst parents and children via texting. Take this mother, for example, who simply had no idea what the term “WTF” stands for.
We’re not going to spell it out for you. Put it this way though – she was wrong about what it stands for. Surely it would have been easier to text something like “Wed, Thurs or Fri.” Anyone could understand what that means. She probably thinks AT&T stands for “all the time.”
Losing Her Patience
Let’s face it, some parents and children treat each other more like best buddies. They have such a deep understanding of each other that they are able to call each other names in a joking kind of way.
You know, how best friends try to get a rise out of each other. That’s exactly what this mother is doing with her son. She doesn’t actually think of him that way, she just thinks it’s funny that he’s more boring than she is.
What’s The Difference?
Don’t know about you, but for many people out there, the closest feeling they know to the feeling of eating ice cream is love.
Maybe that’s why this mom found the symbol for love easy to confuse with ice cream. Evidently, she’s a two scoops kind of woman, so if she’s offering ice cream it’s a great idea to say yes! Everybody can use a little more love and ice cream in their lives.
A New Car For Old Age
They say even a broken clock is right twice a day. Somehow, this mom caught onto the “yolo” trend, as moms so often do, without first checking its meaning.
It just rolls off the tongue so easily, you know? But the philosophy of only living once runs deep enough to affect even those who don’t know it, and this mom found herself living the “yolo” lifestyle without even trying.
When Life Is Too Short
The “yolo” trend is an interesting one, having popularized a few words to mean one thing that could easily be interpreted to mean something else.
“You only live once,” they say, and so you should live that life to the fullest. Take risks! Be bold! But…if you only have one life, shouldn’t you also protect that one life? Maybe don’t take certain risks? This mom is here to make sure her kid doesn’t “yolo” his one life away.
There’s Something Wrong…
There’s something wrong all right, but maybe it’s not with the phone. Fixing this problem will no doubt require one skill moms just don’t seem to have: typing with more than one finger.
No doubt her kid is aware that he can’t send the quick fix through a text message, because if she could understand it, this wouldn’t have happened in the first place. How did this happen anyway? It’s time for Andy to go straight to the source and investigate.
This Is What You Get
It’s also every kid’s dream to get their moms texting more so that they can call less. Until they open the emoji keyboard, and then, well, things get confusing.
They say art is in the eye of the beholder. But unlike art, emojis usually have more specific meanings, and unlike art, text messages are supposed to have a purpose. So when you send emojis, they should make at least some sense. Unless this is what’s for dinner, it’s time to tone these emojis down.
Get To Bed!
Bedtimes are every kid’s nightmare, but having a kid can mean that parents have a bedtime, too. Especially once kids are old enough to verbally guilt trip a parent for their absence. But that doesn’t mean they have the right to give their parents a bedtime…Pepper spray can be a handy tool, but trusting a kid with it is likely hard to do. It’s time to just act like an adult – and adults don’t need bedtimes!
When Autocorrect Is Very Wrong
Sometimes, autocorrect is a really big problem. And this is especially true for parents. In fact, it might actually be better if they just aren’t allowed to use it.
Interestingly, the man who invented autocorrect was on the older side himself. But what was once so simple and helpful has evolved to have quite a mind of its own, working outside the control of even the most tech-savvy texters. Now, the older generations are doomed.
Something You Should Know
Most kids will wonder at some point in their lives what they don’t know about their parents. Well, in most cases, the answer is a LOT. There are just some things it’s not appropriate to tell a kid, and that you don’t want to have been caught lying about later! Having another kid that no one knows about probably tops that list – but this dad was just making the kind of joke that only another parent can appreciate. You’ll get there, son.